Wednesday was planned. From the start until the end. The only thing that wasn’t anticipated were the casual, yet meaningful conversations I had with some people. I always seem to have these talks with most: when there is an impactful exchange of opinions but in a lighthearted, tolerant manner – such that it is enlightening but also easily digestible. I was glad – this added to my adventure.
I set off according to plan.
I had a meeting post-work, one that I had pushed myself to get pumped for ever since it was slotted in my calendar. Its funny how prior to getting it, I really wanted it – but now that I secured the date, deep down I wasn’t looking forward to it. However I did not want to cancel, because that would mean I had given up before trying – and I wanted to see the outcome. I didn’t want to be a hindrance to myself.
I am a meticulous planner – a perfectionist. I hate nonpunctuality (is this a word?) in others’, and refuse to dishonour someone elses time by being late myself. (This is also probably why I would never fare well back in my homeland because the concept of clocks is non existent). Needless to say, external circumstances beyond my control resulted in me not only being late, but also a revocation of any future said meeting. I was put-off due to the poor impression it had given of me, as well as things just not going the way I thought they were going to.
But the subtle undercurrent of relief was becoming palpable as I continued through the rest of my day. As I was walking along to my thoughts, a man passed by me with this written on his shirt: The Lord’s Plans are what happens to you.
I broke into a half-grateful, half-awed smile as I recognised that to be a Sign. God had answered a half-hearted prayer of sorts that I never uttered. I had no idea what would have happened had the meeting occurred, and I had what some would say to be futile excuses as to why I never wanted to go in the first place – so I had mixed, ambiguous feelings. But He took care of my situation in a way I could have never imagined.
If He can respond to me for something I had never asked but received due to His infinite mercy, what makes me doubt that I’m not already set on course to achieving the “bigger” things that I want in my life? Why then, do I have tendencies to give in to wayward melancholic thoughts and throw myself a pity party?